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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 14:55:21 GMT
Yes, it's that time of year again, the time that at least 10 of you have all been waiting for! Before we get cracking with the awards, a musical interlude to warm us up; it's not a song. It's his life. TUNE!!!!
Right, onto the serious stuff, no waste fellows here. The Jose Mourinho award for the biggest whiner has one clear winner this year, with the rest of the nominee's tying for second place. Hogan , Mike and Andy Jay drew 2 votes apiece, which I'm sure they'll be thrilled at for different reasons. Jose isn't impressed though;
This years winner though has had his fair share of whinges, be it from whining about #FreeBTS bullying him for his NFL knowledge to whining about being accused of bullying Mike, a clear winner here with 4 votes is Бенне. Thoughts, Jose? I know Jose, but I'm doing my best.
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 15:00:10 GMT
Having to do this with Internet Explorer btw so it's gonna take a fucking age. The Francis Coquelin award for the most argumentative/passionate member, for which I'm still not sure if it's a positive or negative award to be up for, had a runaway winner. Paul and Mike share second place with 2 votes each, at which stage I'm already starting to think about just leaving out the vote count entirely so this is all a bit less sad. What's that Francis? Fair enough, no more wallowing there's still 20 odd awards to go. Anyway, your clear winner of what I'm assuming is very much the argumentative part of the award is luisgarciaisgod with 6 votes.
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 15:05:21 GMT
The Jack Grealish award for most loyal member seems to often be confused with "member who supports the worst team", which may go some way to explaining ic 's 3rd place with a single, almost sympathetic vote. In second place after a short lived but spirited campaign (ok, it was a single post) detailing his exploits following England home and away, fuck the IRA, or something like that; Dan , with 4 votes, and also probably a phone full of images similar to Grealish himself; Only just winning this award was sween with 5 votes, again probably more so sympathy being shown towards having to follow Sunderland's recent insistence on keeping Newcastle company at the bottom of the table just to add a bit more needle to the Tyne-Wear derby. 3-0.
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 15:11:41 GMT
Although named after Stan Collymore, the nominee's for the best debater rarely shy away from an argument, even when all hope and chance of saving face and dignity is lost, you'd rarely see these four resort to Stan's tactics of block/report/complain/repeat. None of them have ever smacked a woman either. Allegedly. In 3rd place with a solitary vote, and definitely not a woman beater is ChappyHova, even if she does still owe him money. Tied for second place, and definitely not doggers, Mycon and @djed with 2 votes each. Two people who often rely on walls of text to bore their opponent into submission and all those reading to lose interest. We've actually got a clip of a typical Djed argument; Deserved 1st place possibly helped by the infrequency of him actually engaging in debates and thus making his input more reverred is allah with 5 votes, who definitely isn't a dogger nor a woman beater. Allegedly. Hopefully the webm imbeds otherwise I've wasted a lot of time this morning.
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 15:12:23 GMT
Oh cunting bollocks, we're going to take a brief pause whilst we establish a way to get the webm's to play.
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 15:19:40 GMT
Possible dilemma averted, we'll resume after this brief interlude;
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#FreeBTS
Talisman
Posts: 14,782
Likes: 5,177
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Post by #FreeBTS on Dec 15, 2015 15:33:04 GMT
delighted with that assist
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 15:40:55 GMT
That the award for the most biased member being "Liverpool/Spurs" sponsored is quite apt given recent weeks, and as such there's a fair few people placing. luisgarciaisgod came in with a single vote, just behind Star of Spurs, Mike and Stu with 2 votes each. Not entirely sure what specific aspect has led to the winner here, it may be Aberdeen related, it may be SNP related, it may be Scottish national team related, but with 3 votes your most biased member is Olivier.
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 15:43:18 GMT
Next up, Steven's award for the member who tries to be funny but fails was thankfully completed before you and I had to suffer through this write up, which would probably get me more votes than the single one received by тσммσ and cl7. In second place with 3 votes is Maskya Yoshida, meaning that to no great surprise taking home the Steven award is Steven with 5 votes. I don't want to be mean about anybody up for this category, so instead I'll just share this video that I think could be used in response to some of these members posts over the past 12 months;
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 15:47:35 GMT
The PQTE award for best newbie is always a tough one for such an exclusive, unwelcoming clique such as ours, but we've had a plethora of new members this year. That is if you include people re-activating their accounts after leaving. Or search engine bots. Or stalkers from Neo. Or drug-fuelled rebirths. Either way, in 3rd place with 1 vote was Lion of Judaism, who wasn't actually a member because I swear it was Lion of Judah, but who am I to correct such a trivial thing? With 3 votes, Raj from New Delhi, who'd probably be chuffed at placing second ahead of the LOJ rebirth having made only a single post in response to it; here, if you're interested. In first place though, and to no great shock, ange postecoslamp with 6 votes who without any signs of the overwhelming hypocrisy of the situation will gladly take home the best newcomer award for the third year running.
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 15:51:01 GMT
Always a controversial award this, the Skyancez RV in the car park with a long ethernet cable at Old Trafford armchair fan, to give its full name, is for the armchair fan who talks the talk, but never walks the walk, either because they live too far away or there's no transport or they have no money or their dog ate their season ticket or other futile complaints. For what I think is the first time so far during these awards, somebody gets a vote and doesn't even podium, so sorry #FreeBTS, you're just not enough of an armchair fan to get a place on the podium. In third place with 2 votes, Liverpool_96 who has probably attended more German football games than he has Liverpool this year. In second, Stu with 3 votes, which I'm assuming can only be to do with his lack of attendance at Chelsea games? This years winner though is part time Boro full time Shildon fan Maskya Yoshida with 4 votes. I wonder how he'll take winning such a prestigious award?
Probably like that.
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Бенне
Key Player
Posts: 8,741
Likes: 1,799
Team: Nottingham Forest
Member is Online
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Post by Бенне on Dec 15, 2015 16:01:43 GMT
Our ruse worked #FreeBTS, we'll halve the award
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 16:01:46 GMT
The award for the best substance-induced meltdown was a close run affair, and also a ball-ache to try and link to as two of the three have since been removed. The one we can still see in it's full glory though is тσммσ's post about drying his spunk out so others can snort it, which came in third with 2 votes. With 3 votes, Cashis' drunken use of the internet resulted not in posting a picture of his dick about to spaff inside his ms, lovely stuff, but instead a threat to "knock Maskya Yoshida out u fat fuck". As big a meltdown as that was, it was only a short lived one, whereas the winner with 5 votes, lasted for at least a week to the surprise of many. Mike's rebirth as the Lion of Judah (Bah Bless) provided laughter and confusion in equal measures, not least that it took him 48 hours to noticed Zab Judah's face on his avatar.
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 16:09:03 GMT
The STOP PROMOTING GAMBLING award for best staff member has seen no acknowledgement in the nominations round for the work done by any previous moderators, so sorry that your input ange postecoslamp (Funny drawings) and #FreeBTS (Breaking one of the most important rules of an internet community) and Disenchanted (Was that even 2015?) hasn't been acknowledged, but if you'd have just posted some quickly knocked up bar charts like g7vikings you'd have got 1 vote for third place, if you'd have paid for the forum name minus the proboards you'd have got 2 votes for a second place like sween , or if you'd have put some headers up and dealt with daily PM's from a bloke who thinks he's a lion you could have won this award with 7 votes like @djed did. What a cool guy.
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Post by Gianni Infantino on Dec 15, 2015 16:11:32 GMT
The biggest football fan award is probably one of the nicer awards here, although that isn't saying too much, if anything it's your peers telling you they think you watch too much football or get into it all a bit too much. Three people tied for second place with a single vote, those members being ChappyHova, daveyposhboy and Mycon. There was a runaway winner though, probably for his interest in all things Dutch and German, and also probably with memories of punishing himself with regular visits to the DW Stadium fresh in the mind, is g7vikings with 7 votes.
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